Can no longer link to iTunes library on local net

I've been using a 2011 Mini for my media server for about a year. It holds my iTunes library and has always worked fine. I often linked to it with my Macbook to have music in my home office.
After upgrading both machines to Mavericks and iTunes 11.1.3, I can no longer link to the library with the Macbook. right after the upgrade, I could navigate to the Mini's /Music library, but not down to the iTunes subfolder; the subfolders did not appear in the selection menu. It would act as if the /Music folder was at the end of the tree. I tinkered with the sharepoints on the mini, and took out the /Music share and added one for /iTunes. Now iTunes on my Macbook ususally crashes when I select that.
I am able to navigate the Mini's disk with the finder from my Macbook ok, so sharing appears to work.
Itunes continues to work fine on the Mini playing its own library, and the MacBook works fine with its little library.
I have used Tuneup 2.0 for over a year and been very happy with it. I recently upgraded to Tunepe 3.0, which seems to be a big step backward, but I had the problem before running the new version.
I'm really frustrated and would be very grateful for any help or insights.
John Purtell

Hi there,
For the past few months, I've had no problem
connecting to my friend's iMac over a local network.
Lately, when I click connect, the ftp dialogue pops
up rather than the "connect to server" dialogue. I
don't want no stinking ftp.
Confusing...
When you say "when I click connect" what are you clicking on?
What happens if you press command + K and in the connect to server window enter the server's IP address?

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