Can't use my apple id account at all! Can't reset password either!!

I set up an acount from iPad for my family half year ago (it was a gmail)
the acount was set up for the Facetime on the iPad and it was working fine.
recently I upgrade the iPad to iOS5 and try to use the same account for the iCloud & facetime etc.
but was not able to login
I thought I forgot the password so I try to reset the password from apple's site (this page)
but I never get the reset email from apple
so I tried varify by answering question, it asked for birthday but the page told me my answer is not correct!! ? Not possible!!!! I know my birthday okay!?
then I tried to find out what my apple ID is by this page (link)
and it failed too!!!! it said "No Apple ID found" 
and I think if the page told me this ID doesn't exist, then I can recreate this account using the same email, so I tried...
but it said this email is already used by other apple ID!!!!
what's happening??
I'm very sure my family use this account for facetime and it was working fine for the pass half year
how come I can't find any account information on apple's site
and can't receive any email from apple and can't reset pwd ...etc.
I don't know what I can do now~
I really don't want to create another new acount using other email if I can get this account back
any one can help??
please save my miserable life..........
tks

Welcome to the Apple Community.
Start here (change country if necessary) and navigate to 'Password and Security', reset your security questions using the link provided, you will receive an email to your rescue address, use the link in the email and reset your security questions.
If that doesn't help, you don't receive a reset email or you don't have a rescue address, you should contact AppleCare who will initially try to assist you with a reset email or if unsuccessful will pass you to the security team to reset your security questions for you.
If you are in a region that doesn't have international telephone support try contacting Apple through iTunes Store Support.

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