Syncing shared calendar in iCal

Hello,
My wife and I use google calendar's to put all of our events and commitments in, and we "share" our respective calendars with the other so we can see what the other is up to and try and plan around each other.
I use the mail app and iCal for e-mails and my calendar, however I have not been able to find a way for the shared calendar (my wife's calendar) to show up on my iPhone/iPad.  Ideally I would like to see both her and my events, and be able to add things to both calendar's if possible.
Doe anyone have any ideas on how this should be accomplished?
Thanks so much!

You should be able to select the calendar in the Calendar app at Google.com by clicking the little triangle beside it's name when you mouse over it. Select Share this Calendar and change the Permissions setting for the person you are sharing with. If your wife is not there then you'll have to delete the calendar on her device then send an invite with the appropriate permissions. Shared calendars verses synced calendars probably have different options.

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