Unable to pair Apple Remote App with iTunes

I am running a Toshiba Satellite L505D-S5965 with Windows Vista SP 2. My iTunes software is 8.2.1.6, and my iPhone 3GS is running OS 3.0.1 (7A400). Both the Satellite and iPhone are connected to the same WiFi local network, and yet the App "Remote" by Apple Software is unable to communicate with iTunes to allow the entry of the four digit code to establish control of the iTunes library. Shortly after purchasing the iPhone 3GS I purchased the Satellite, but in the couple of weeks between the purchases the Remote App worked fine on my Gateway running Windows XP SP2. I have been through Apple Telephone support twice, and have really run one of the technicians through the mill researching possible solutions. I have visited an Apple Store Genius, who could find no reason for the problem. The iPhone and Remote App worked perfectly well on the store's WiFi and Mac, but his iPhone also wouldn't work with my laptop. I have been through Kaspersky's technical support system to ensure that there isn't a firewall issue. They have assured me, after reviewing logs from my laptop, that this is not the case. I even went so far as to uninstall all my Kaspersky product, but the Apple Remote App still would not function properly. I have updated the router's firmware, and checked that the laptop's wireless card is running the latest driver. At this point I can't think of anything else to try but would really appreciate any suggestions. Thanks, Steve

Monday 7th Jan.
Just to say that Apple did call me this am to discuss the problem on foot of a call I made last week.
In the meantime the remote worked with both a 2007 IMac and a 2009 laptop but not on the m-mini.
When I tried pairing this morning during the call by pressing Menu and next together it paired.
The change is very subtle, it just says paired in the advanced section of the security et sl section as referred before, with a fleeting 2 intersecting rings icon.
The big difference is that Front Row is gone....
The remote only works to a limited degree within some apps such as iTunes and iPhotos.
In theory it controls the volume in iTunes but as of now for me it doesnt....:( need to look more.
As to what the problem was:
It seems there is a set of keyboard combinations that can be used to force a reset the ID of the remote, the suggestion is MAYBE that by getting it to work on the iMac and laptop in some way reset the ID.
This stuff is WAY beyond my skill level:)
I did impress upon Apple the need to look at the issue in threads like this....
Message was edited by: qazxsw52

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MB C2D (Black, 2GB RAM) Mac OS X (10.4.9)
Powerbook G4 15 (1.33GHz, Combo Drive) Mac OS X (10.4.2)
Powerbook G4 15 (1.33GHz, Combo Drive) Mac OS X (10.4.2)

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