What is the best way to remotely login to another Mac?

My mother & I recently decided to take the plunge from the PC world to Apple world.  I have an MBP w/ OS X 10.8.2, and she has the same w/o the recent OS upgrade (10.7.?).  While we're both still at the bottom of the learning curve, I'm a little further ahead and am constantly running over to her place to trouble shoot/assist her with the transition.  I've been researching ways to remotely login to her computer and am now more confused than when I started.  Can anyone point me in the right direction?  I basically want to be able to login to her system and takeover as if I were on site.  And, while I don't know if my research, thus far, has brought me any closer to a solution, it has raised a few questions:
1)  Do I simply want to go with 3rd party sofware like Logmein and will the free versions be sufficient or are they just trial offers?
2)  Or is ARD my best option and am I right in assuming we'd each have to pony up the $80 for installs on both MBPs?
3)  Some of the discussions talk about much more expensive ARD fees with multiple licenses.  Am I correct in assuming these are meant for network administrators and wouldn't be necessary for my purposes?
4)  I noticed a free VCN version available from the App Store but came accross posts which seem to indicate possible security issues.  Are these valid concerns and does ARD address them?
5)  Will I run into problems because we're using different OSs?
6)  I attempted to follow instructions for an "ssh" remote login that I found by doing a search of 'remote login' under the Apple Support.  But when a password was requested, I didn't seem to be able to enter one into the command line.  Again, I'm new to Macs, but the cursor didn't move when I entered characters, so I was left wondering whether characters were being entered or whether this is Appple's '*****' feature used to guard passwords.  Either way, after 3 attempts, my efforts were repeatedly terminated.  Unfortunately, I'm not even sure I was entering a valid password as the article I'm referring to didn't specify how to set a password.  I used a VCN password I had set up under the Remote Management option in the Sharing utility under System Preferences.  I'm assuming this was the password they were looking for but couldn't be 100% sure as the instructions I followed were not related to "ssh" logins nor were they from Apple Suppot.  Anyway, is this "ssh" login worth pursuing and does it function independently or does it only work in conjuction with ARD?  If it is a stand alone solution, where can I go for better guidance?  The Apple Support link I used was:  http://support.apple.com/kb/PH1112.
7)  Being recovering Windows users, we both have MS Office for Mac 2011 which has MS's Remote Desktop Connection app.  But from reviewing a few posts, it looks like that comes with it's own set of issues.  It also kind of defeats the purpose as I'm trying to wien myself off of MS.  But if someone out there has experience and suggests this as the "ultimate" solution, I'm willing to listen.
I know I've babbled on quite a bit and I don't actually expect anyone to take the time to answer all of my questions.  But I'm hoping I might get a collective answer, and more importatnly, I'm really hoping to narrow the field and get generally guidance on the best Mac-to-Mac remote login solution.  Thanks in advance for any advice.

Hi gregory,
It is a big subject, and the following article sets out various options.
http://www.macworld.com/article/1152611/remoteaccesintro.html

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