1 phone syncs, 1 phone doesn't

I'm not sure what caused this, but we have 2 iphone's here. Recently, one of them stopped being recognised by iTunes. My iPhone 4 works just fine. My son's iPhone 3G does not. It is recognised by Windows when it is plugged in. However iTunes hangs immediately if the 3G is plugged in (not with the iPhone 4 though). about 4 or 5 minutes later it un-hangs so I can again use iTunes. But the 3G is not listed in the devices category.
I have tried all the uninstall-reinstall suggestions in the tutorials, and even wiped his phone to try to re-install. Now its stuck at the "connect to itunes" part but that is impossible. I dont know how to make it function again. Wierdly, if I plug the iPhone 3G into another computer iTunes immediately recognises it. So presumably its a problem with the drivers. But specifically the ones for the 3G and not the 4? I'm lost.
Windows 7 x64 SP1
iTunes 10.2.1
Message was edited by: bigshooter1974

It's obviously another blatant failure of the MobileMe Team and is really unacceptable to have this problem continue to this day. Who's concious decision was it to not allow for the ringtone field? Address Book is a likely candidate to store it.
I want a full refund of my investment in ringtones, all $14 of it (LOL) but I've seen a post from someone who uses only the phone's standard ringtones and keeps getting the default.
OK, I'm just saying I want to rule my phone and not the reverse. Come on Apple, you're getting too bloated with features that falter.

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