Any HINTS on how to get questions answered faster?

Based on http://forum.java.sun.com/thread.jsp?forum=10&thread=423278&tstart=0&trange=100
"GCD: Well duh..It was OT. It didn't ask any Java related questions!"
I have a question about Java questions:
Does anybody have any suggestions or guidelines for posting Java questions in order to help get quick, helpful answers?
Will it help if I use all caps, and a bunch of exclamation points, like "URGENT!!!!!!" in my Java question?
Will it help if I make both the subject and the Java question itself very vague? Maybe a subject of "Why doesn't this work?" and a body consisting of 1000 lines of unformatted code?
Speaking of which, why isn't there a link anywhere that tells me how to format the code that I include in my Java question?
Will it help to crosspost my Java question?
Should I just post my Java homework and ask you guys to do it for me?
Should I ignore common courtesy, and scream when my question isn't answered in 5 minutes, and not say thank you when it's answered in 10?

Does anybody have any suggestions or guidelines for posting Java >questions in order to help get quick, helpful answers?Yes. If you don't want that people suspect that you're trying to get your homework done for you, follow these guidelines :
-Ask questions with a strong academic flavor, that sound like an invitation to parrot some textbook.
-Avoid anything like personal tone, specific angle, real-world application possibilities.
-Don't provide any background about how you came to be interested in that question.
-Don't show any commitment in getting it answered that could betray your utter cluelessness about the whole issue.
-Don't show any involvement in the forum beyond the immediate benefit you expect from it. Just post and run away.
If you follow these principles, you will see your thread sparkle passionate discussions and sticking on the frontpage for the weeks to come.

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