Apple mail won't delete a message on the server but my iPhone will...

Hello,
I have an iMac running the latest version of Snow Leopard, and use Apple Mail with an IMAP server. Recently, I noticed that when I try to delete a message on my apple mail, that it won't get deleted on the server or my iphone. However, if I do the reverse and delete the message on my iPhone, it gets removed from the server and apple mail.
I have setup Apple Mail as an IMAP account, and on the iphone Active Synch Exchange for the same account. I tried to switch the Apple Mail account to an exchange IMAP account, and it made no difference. Any ideas on how to address this problem - it is really annoying to have to delete the same message twice? Thanks!

Hi ernie,
Thanks for the help. As for the mailbox preferce I have it set on move deleted to seperate folder (one week old).
Here's the strange part - i have 1 email, only 1 email that will not delete and that's in my inbox, now when i click on view "Show Deleted Message" is greyed out..
http://i25.tinypic.com/33mx1et.png
I also have 1 email and only 1 email in my outbox that will not delete and when i click on view it shows "Show Deleted message".
http://i29.tinypic.com/xaw27d.png
so what do you think the problem may be?
-Joey

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