Apple makes awesome machines!!! - Now a Sound issue!

Question

/Sarcasm/
So, the more I use this amazing machine, the more I find problems with it.
I already have the super cool blinking screen feature, and the pretty graphics artifacts that so many people seem to have, Vista Freezing problem, but today I found a super new awesome feature.
This feature is a cool "laser/R2D2" sound when using headphones. It's really cool cause every time a song stops or there is silence in a song, you hear this cool "pewwww" sound.
Of course I searched the forums and the internet and in typical fashion I found a bunch of people with the problem, but whenever it was brought to the "Apple Techs" they convenienctly can't hear the issue.
So what now? It seems the problem has been happening for some time now, but no one even acknowledges the issue. I can't return my MBP because it's "custom", I can't get it fixed because it seems it doesn't do anything (according to the people on the forums).
If anyone has any ideas as to what to do. So far every day I use this thing there is another cool issue that pops up that Apple doesn't seem to have a fix for other than "replacing the logic board" which seems to be the stock solution.
Can someone please offer some advice. If Apple isn't going to address the issues, then what can we do? Should I just make it a mission to go into the Apple store, and keep opening boxes in the store, testing each computer until I have like 18 open and maybe then they'll say, "Hmmm, maybe there is a problem"
Anyway, any advice would be great...
Dammit...while we're at it...is there a FN key to disable the trackpad temporarily when using a mouse...I'm tired of typing and having it screw up when my thumb happens to rest on the pad.
+1 Apple!

Answer 1

First, I'm sorry but I don't just willy nilly post things before I do my homework on them. I have had this computer for exactly one week now and I have spent the whole week on forums, reinstalling software, on the phone with Apple, calling my friends who have macs, and driving 4 hours to the Apple store to try and get some answer.
For a computer that is supposed to, "just work" I have had to put in a lot of effort for that to happen and as a result I haven't gotten any work done this week..so you can imagine why I might be a tad cranky considering I have lost money in that process due to this computer not working as claimed.
Secondly, I'm not looking for the cliche answers here like, "This is a user forum", and "not everyone has this problem".
The facts are that while not everyone has this problem, you have to ask yourself why is it that these and other forums are so full of people with the exact problem? If we're talking about laws of chance here, what are the chances of me having so many issues with so many Apple products. Do you think I'm simply the most unlucky person in the world...no, luck is not real...so perhaps it's something else.
My attitude is a direct result in the fact that I am tired of dealing with this stuff and just want my computer to work. It's because I'm tired of calling Apple and having them say, "If it happens again, call us back." I need answers, not people brushing things under the carpet.
On to the technical questions.
There is option in the system preferences to turn off the trackpad. Before you claim there is, they must have taken it out for some reason on the MBP's. There is no option at all, anywhere in the system preferences.
As for all other problems being hardware related...that seems to always be the general assumption, and solution around here. Keep getting logic boards replaced until you get a good one.
I don't buy it, and honestly....my friend said it perfect today when I asked him about these issues, he said, "You're asking your mac, and the community for answers they don't have....Macs are made for the masses, not for people who actually know what they're doing, if something goes wrong, you take it back and stand there dumbfounded while they swap out parts."
He's been a mac user for 8+ years.
I'm a pc user...so when there is an issue I look to find the solution. I want it solved on mine and all other computers. Taking the computer in 2, 10, 50 times to get the logic board replaced does nothing until I understand what the issue is.
The sound thing may be driver related (hence why I emailed Reaktek), the graphics issues might be software related....but the problem is that Apple is the only company I have ever dealt with that just denies no wrong. When I call them they put me through these asinine steps that obviously have nothing to do with solving the issue. When I give them the troubleshooting information I have gathered, they go, "hmmmm".
I can't email anyone at Apple because they have no email, so I have to explain all the issues over and over again to some customer service person who really doesn't know anything and the problem never gets into the right hands.
Anyway, I need 6 issues solved and those are.
1. Graphic Artifacting
2. Flickering Screen
3. R2-D2 Sound issue
4. Vista Freezing
5. Improper Fan control in Vista/OSX
6. Turning off Trackpad
If I can get these solved (and these are not unreasonable), then you guys probably won't hear from me for a while. So if anyone has any advice on how to solve any of these it would be great.
I AM (if this helps eliminate any of these responses) go and get my logic board replaced, but I am waiting for official Apple response on the graphic artifacts before I go and do that so I know I'm not just getting another one with another problem.