Arrrgh-buddies not appearing online

Ok, I am officially frustrated. My buddy list stopped showing when my buddies are online and offline. I have deleted my buddies and added them, but it still doesn't work. i deleted my wife off and re-added her(including deleting her off of the address book). Her icon came back up but she is still greed out, even though she is sitting next to me. She comes up in bonjour just fine. We are both on macbooks running the latest and greatest in Tiger, and we have an airport extreme and airport express in our house. Any help would be greatly appreciated.

Also check they are not accidently Blocking you.
They are on a PC have they got Invisiblity On.
If you are at the same location using the same modem, how have you set it up to allow computers to use the same ports ?
iChat will need port 5190 on UDP to see the Buddy list properly - if this Port Forwarded (including Protocols on soem devices) to one computer the other may not be able to log into AIM at all or show discrepanncies as described here.
1:12 PM Wednesday; October 18, 2006

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