Audio and Video Chat problems

I have a G5 at home and have a MacBook Pro on the road and I am trying to video chat with my finacee (me using my mac account, her using an AOL IM account). We can text chat and send files through iChat, but if we try audio or video chat we both get the following error message. We both tried a test buddy (appleu3test01) and it worked fine, but we still can not chat with each other. I don't know what else to do.
There was a communication error during your chat. iChat encountered errors while communicating with participants in this chat. You can send details about the problems to Apple to help improve future versions of iChat.
Details:
Date/Time: 2006-12-18 00:24:29.767 +0000
OS Version: 10.4.8 (Build 8N1037)
Report Version: 4
iChat Connection Log:
AVChat started with ID 3420032075.
[email protected]: State change from AVChatNoState to AVChatStateWaiting.
0x19d159e0: State change from AVChatNoState to AVChatStateInvited.
0x19d159e0: State change from AVChatStateInvited to AVChatStateConnecting.
[email protected]: State change from AVChatStateWaiting to AVChatStateConnecting.
[email protected]: State change from AVChatStateConnecting to AVChatStateEnded.
Chat ended with error -8
0x19d159e0: State change from AVChatStateConnecting to AVChatStateEnded.
Chat ended with error -8
Video Conference Error Report:
Video Conference Support Report:
Video Conference User Report:
Binary Images Description for "iChat":
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Hi THall12,
Welcome to the Apple Discussions
This is the important bit.
Chat ended with error -8
Video Conference Error Report:
Video Conference Support Report:
Video Conference User Report:
Binary Images Description for "iChat":
If the process has moved to port 5060 then the SIP data from your end at least should show here.
Which Ports and WHY http://www.ralphjohnsuk.dsl.pipex.com/page3.html
Other Log views
Scroll down this page http://www.ralphjohnsuk.dsl.pipex.com/page16.html
Options to check.
Your Mac Firewall - Has it got the iChat A?V ports if ON ?
Your modem - Have the ichat ports been enabled here ?
Any other router involved ?
Does your ISP block port 5060 for a VoIP service they offer ?
9:12 PM Tuesday; December 19, 2006

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