Back to My Mac not working-a diagnosis and a solution

Question

Hello all,
I own a small business and relied on Back to My Mac while traveling. I have had connection issues with BTMM since MobileMe was discontinued. I have found a solution but it is not an Apple solution. Skip to the end if you'd like the straight dope.
FYI: I have exhausted all possible Apple-centric solutions, to the best of my knowledge. This was verified over the phone during an extensive troubleshooting session with a senior Apple specialist. All Macs and OS involved are optimized (in theory) to work with Back to My Mac. The appropriate file sharing options were checked. Users had appropriate access privileges. I have a valid MobileMe ID that has transferred over smoothly to iCloud. Firewall settings were not the issue.
But before we go further, if you are having BTMM connectivity issues, you might want to examine this thread:
https://discussions.apple.com/thread/4071540
And see if it does the trick for you. It seems to have worked for a lot of people. But if it doesn't, please read on.
I have an iMac at my office that I connect to. I have a MacBook that I use to make the remote connections. Before MobileMe was discontinued, I read all support docs on how to make the transition to iCloud. Nevertheless, once MobileMe was discontinued, I began to have BTMM connection issues. My Macbook could "see" my iMac, and vice versa, but once connection was attempted, either through "Share Screen" or "Connect As…",  the status bar would run indefinitely and no connection would complete.
First, I tried the Keychain solution indicated above. No dice.
Then I saw the System Preferences>iCloud message that Back to My Mac required NAT Port Mapping and/or Universal Plug and Play settings on my router. I have an old Linksys router, and I was able to upgrade its settings to UP&P, but not to NAT Port Mapping. The situation did not improve.
I went to an Apple Store, spoke with a pair of salespeople who informed me that the problem would most likely be solved by replacing my old router with Airport Extreme, which would automatically upgrade my network to the necessary UP&P and NAT-PM protocols, and if any issues existed after that, they would probably be firewall-related, which I could either fix on my own or talk to an Apple person about.
After installing Airport Extreme, the situation did not improve, and I called Apple Support. I entered the serial number into the web page, and was informed that I was not qualified for tech support because my warranty had expired, even though I had made the purchase the previous evening. I checked the option that indicated that I thought this was in error and that I was in fact qualified, and ten minutes later, I received a phone call from Apple.
At first, I was on the line with a Airport Extreme specialist, who ran down the Airport Utility checklist. With my wife at the Macbook at home, and myself in my office at the iMac and on the phone with the Apple specialist, the troubleshooting began. Once it was apparent that nothing was working, I was transferred to a "senior" specialist who indeed knew everything under the sun about networking and Back to My Mac, at least as far as I could tell. We checked various settings on all devices, Airport configurations, iCloud account validity, my network's firewall settings, etc. 
Finally, the specialist suggested we check the settings on my home router, which was supplied by my ISP and not an Apple device. I asked him why. He said that if we enabled UP&P and NAT-PM on my home router, that would probably help make the connection. I informed him that while that might be a short-term fix, I travel as part of my job and need to make remote connections to my office, often from places where I have no control over the router settings. He informed me that because of those "variables" I might very well continue to experience connection issues, and that in some locations I would be able to connect, and some, not.
On the heels of all the time and money spent thus far, I was in disbelief. We spent some more time affirming beyond question that he was actually telling me what I thought he was telling me, and I cordially thanked him for his time and we ended the phone support session.
THE STRAIGHT DOPE: I learned from a senior Apple specialist that network and router settings not only have to be just right at the server location but *also* the remote location in order for Back to My Mac to work. Simply having an iCloud ID is not always enough. If you travel, you most likely have no control over router settings at your hotel, coffee shop, etc., and if you rely on remote connections as part of your job, you can't afford to take the chance that wherever you reside might not be BTMM compatible. I signed up for LogMeIn Pro, at a cost of $59.95 a year. It has screen sharing, file sharing *and* iPhone access, which BTMM does not offer. My remote connections are now almost instantaneous and without issue. Problem solved.
Please note, I have no ax to grind with Apple, I enjoy using their products and believe they are superior to Windows machines. I am also more than happy with the level of expertise, courtesy and efficiency of their support people. The Airport Extreme that I purchased is pretty cool, has kickass wireless signal, and has reduced the amount of wiring on my desk thanks to its wireless printing and hard drive capabilities. I feel a little burned that I bought it for no reason, but I have 14 days to return it, no questions asked. We'll see.
In conclusion, Back to My Mac does not seem to work as advertised. I am curious if anyone has had a similar experience. Hope this helps someone or at least, saves you some time.

Answer 1

Thanks for your thorough post. I too need to use BTMM on almost a daily basis for my job, and it has fallen short countlness times. I too have taken great pains to check all of the typical trouble shooting steps within iCloud and in the Apple keychain on each Mac etc, but after the latest rounds of system updates from Apple a few weeks ago to Mountain Lion, BTMM on one of my Macs is completely broken and unusable. I would concur that if you need remote access for "real" mission critical use, just bite the bullet and pay for a service like LogMeIn. You won't regret it and you will get real software support.