Blackberry to iPhone 3G - ARGH: help with  push-pull-sync

I just switched from a blackberry to iPhone and cant figure out how to have my email/contacts/calendars sync'd in REAL TIME across my phone and PC. My primary email account is on a personal domain and I primarily use my phone and Outlook (thick client) to manage emails, contacts and calendar items.
My blackberry would do all of this automatically and I didn't need to run any special software (such as activesync) on a server to obtain this functionality.
It seems like I could setup a "@me.com' account to do this in a round about sort of way however is this really necessary to have this type of functionality? I've got to believe that there is a 'blackberry way' to do this.
I don't want or need another email address. I just want real-time synchronization of email/contacts/calendars for my EXISTING email address / existing domain.
Can someone help? Thanks!

RIM provides a dedicated email delivery service and over the air syncing for contact information and calendar events so ActiveSync isn't required, but this isn't free to companies that incorporate it instead of using a direct connection to their Exchange Server with mobile devices via ActiveSync.
Not sure how this works with a personal account.
Apple does not provide a dedicated email delivery service for different email accounts and for an Exchange account. Apple licensed ActiveSync from Microsoft for the iPhone which provides for Push access with an Exchange account, along with over the air syncing for contact information and calendar events direct between the iPhone and the Exchange server.
Apple provides a MobileMe account - which is designed for personal use and is "Exchange for the rest of us". This includes Push access for the MM email account, and over the air syncing for contact information and calendar events between the iPhone, the supported application or applications on your computer, and the MobileMe "cloud".
If you want over the air syncing for contact information and calendar events with your iPhone, you need an Exchange Account that supports accessing the account via ActiveSync, or a MobileMe account.

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