Calendar Sync Alert lists deleted events that I don't want deleted?

When I sync my iphone and macbook pro I get a calendar alert because it will change 5% of my calendar events or more. Problem is - the items it's listing as "deleted" have not been deleted? what I mean is that I didn't ever delete them from either device and I don't want them deleted but there is no way for me "deselect" these items. I just have to cancel the sync so I don't loose all the events it's lising and my calendars remain unsynced. How can I remedy this without loosing the events?
Thanks, Heather

In iCal on your computer go to Preferences/Advanced, and uncheck the option to delete events after a period of time.

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