Can I manually manage my iPhone4 music from 2 computers (iTunes)?

I have a work computer (with some music) and a home computer (with a lot of different music).  I would like to be able to plug my iPhone 4 into either device and manually manage my music.  I dont particularly want to "sync" my iPhone with either iTunes.  I use my iTunes account to sign into the iTunes program on both computers, however. 
I have the IOS 6 and I downloaded the most recent iTunes version on both computers. 
When I plug in my iPhone4 to my work computer I have to check the box "Manually manage my music" but when I go to save that setting, it tells me it needs to sync and erase the music on the iPhone in order to move music manually from work computer to iPhone4.  Then if I have music on my home computer and I plug the iPhone4 into that I have the same issue.  I have to check "Manually manage music" but then it wants me to sync and erase whats currently on the iPhone. 
I also dont want to sync all songs from my iTunes on either computer;  I want to take some songs from one computer and some songs from another.
Is this intentionally made to be difficult or is there a setting on the iPhone that will allow me to truly manually manage the music, regardless of what computer I am plugging it into?

There has to be a way around this. My "home" pc that i have 90% of my music from is 200 miles away. I travel a lot. I buy cds. So what this means is that if i buy a CD, i have to wait until i next visit my home PC to load that physical CD into itunes there and get it onto my iphone?
Does Apple seriously mean that to happen? That i cant, you know , buy a CD for MY use, on MY iphone through MY laptop and that I  have to wait god knows how many months until i visit the old Home PC (which is mine) which has the greater store of music on before i can listen to it through their device!?
I despair.

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