Can Iphone 4 activity (including internet activity - facebook messages) be monitored by someone if they had access to your phone (like a family member)?  How can you check?

I am wonderimng just how safe the iphone 4 is - if someone has access to your phone (say a family member) can they put sometrhing on ur iphone (that isn't jail broken) that tracks your activity - particularly things like messages in facebook (by using the messenger app that you can down load from the app store)?  If so is there anyway to tell if it's been done?  Everything I read seems to indicate that its not possible to install spyware on an iphone - but strange things happen - including slow response and being logged out of online accounts (ie facebook messenger).  I know that one solution would be to restore to factory defaults but when you do this is it ok to restore your phone from back up or should it be rstored like a new phone (especially if the itunes account is a shared account)?
I keep thinking I am just being paranoid but it would be good to get some up to date advice about this.

That's the great thing with ios is it uses a sandbox file system. So installing spyware confines it to its sandbox so it cannot access other file or track anything. Unless you jailbreak at that point there is no more sandbox.

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