Can't connect to SL mini after laptop update to Lion

Situation:
- Mac Mini on Snow Leopard 10.6.8 (mini-old)
- Mac Mini on Lion 10.7.4 (mini-new)
- Macbook Pro on Lion 10.7.4, update from Snow Leopard 10.6.8 since yesterday
I used to be able to connect file sharing and screen sharing from the laptop to both mini's. Since the update to Lion on my laptop, I can't connect to mini-old from the laptop.
- file sharing from laptop to mini-old before the lion update -> worked
- screen sharing from laptop to mini-old before the lion update -> worked
- file sharing from mini-new to mini-old -> works
- screen sharing from mini-new to mini-old -> works
- file sharing from laptop to mini-new -> works
- screen sharing from laptop to mini-new -> works
- file sharing from laptop to mini-old after lion update, with guest -> works
- file sharing from laptop to mini-old after lion update, with registered user -> endless pinwheel, no error in console
- screen sharing from laptop to mini-old after lion update -> endless pinwheel, no error in console
- ssh user@mini-old from laptop to mini-old after lion update -> works
So I can safely assume the settings on mini-old are ok (haven't been changed in many months).
I've tried deleting the caches with OnyX on the laptop, but that didn't help.

Update: 'several' minutes = 10
Same goes for the file sharing.
I've tried the screen sharing a 2nd time to see if it speeds up, but it doesn't. :-( Don't know yet what's going on, because the connection from the mini-new is instantly.
FYI: all three are on the same local network, so no remote 'across the internet' issues.
Anybody?

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