Can't find my library

Okay, I may get a bit windy but here is the situation.
I have an external hard drive that I used for more than a year with a netbook. I have a folder named Bet's Netbook on it that contains the following folders:
Album Artwork
Cache
Dowload
Automatically Add to iTunes (empty)
iTunes Media
Audiobooks (Contains 4 folders with books that have been downloaded, but not all the books I've downloaded)
Automatically Add to iTunes (this folder is empty)
Mobile Applications (contains 10 apps but they look like dupes so actually 5)
Music
Many folders for each artis (this could pretty much be all my music)
Mobile Applications (this folder is empty)
Previous iTunes Libraries (contains 3 iTunes Libraries all only about 5KB)
Then, below the 5 folders that I have listed are the following files:
iTunes Library (file type iTunes Database 245 KB)
iTunes Library (XML Document 1,171 KB)
iTunes Library/Extras (iTunes Database File 16 KB)
iTunes Library Genius (iTunes Database File 32 KB)
I have a new laptop and had to download iTunes. When I try to set it up I don't know how to find the right library. I can see the 5 apps but I don't see the music. What am I doing wrong? I used to be blond but it has turned to gray and I'm getting frustrated.

Ideally your library would be set out a bit like the image on the right. From what you posted it seems the folder containing the library is called "Bet's Notebook" so presumably that is what it written at the top of the iTunes window when it is running.
You can delete the empty Automatically Add to iTunes and Mobile Application folders in the top folder. If you want to "normalise" the library so it conforms to the current layout...
Make sure that under Edit > Preferences > Advanced the media folder location is <Drive>\Bet's Notebook\iTunes Media. If so close iTunes, otherwise correct, do not consolidate when prompted, close iTunes, reopen then close again.
Rename Bet's Notebook as iTunes.
Use the shift-start-iTunes method to open the library file <Drive>\iTunes\iTunes Library.itl.
Check under Edit > Preferences > Advanced the media folder location is now <Drive>\iTunes\iTunes Media. If not, correct, do not consolidate when prompted, close iTunes, then reopen.
At a guess you have probably downloaded some files into the media folder in <User's Music>\iTunes. These files can be moved into the Automatically Add to iTunes folder on the external drive. iTunes audiobooks are a one-time only download so hopefully you have all of those, other missing purchases should be downloadable from your Purchased history in the iTunes store.
tt2

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