Can't get wife's phone contacts to sync correctly... to anything/anywhere

Question

I previously set up my 3GS phone to sync contacts with Google in iTunes, and then later set up my Gmail as an exchange account on my phone with contacts set to sync. After some working and deleting of duplicates, etc. I finally got it working like it should.
Now I tried to set iTunes to sync contacts on my wife's 3GS with her Gmail account, but somehow it switched to Windows Address Book and she ended up with my phone's contacts on her phone in addition to her contacts. So I tried again to sync with her Google account. It asked me if I wanted to Merge or Replace the contacts on the phone. I selected Merge, and when it was done she had her Gmail contacts (email only, no numbers) on her phone, and all her phone contacts were gone. They were also not in Gmail. Luckily they were on her SIM card so I was able to get them back on the phone.
It seems like no matter what I do, she either ends up with no phone contacts on her phone, or has both hers and mine, or some combination thereof, but I can't ever seem to get her phone contacts to propagate elsewhere. What am I doing wrong?

Answer 1

i was facing the same problem and i did exactly the same steps u did but with some changes and it work:
     1) removing iCloud account
     2) removing my exchnage account and re creating it.
     3)* using only the username befor the "@"
     4) having SSL off
     5) Reseting network settings
     6) Both in wifi and 3gs.
     7)* have the "mail Days to sync" -> "No limit"
     8)* i have installed a profile confegration from http://support.apple.com/kb/ts3398 i dont know if it was really efficting the           processs since it was mad for exchange problems in ios 4.
i hop i find it useful