Cannot reset ipod, can't turn off, won't stay connected to computer

I have a 3rd gen classic ipod 20 gb - not color. I hadn't used it in a couple of months and i recently started using it again. It was connecting fine and it would charge fine and i could put music on it. A few days after using it again, it would no longer connect to my computer (windows). it would connect and then disconnect itself right away without giving itunes the chance to recognize it, over and over again. it also doesn't let me turn it off or pause, when i hit it, it goes back or forward to the next song. It's also tricky to hit the menu button to go back. sometimes it will work and sometimes it will not. also when i tap it on my desk like if i'm setting it down and it is off, it will turn on. i didn't drop it or put it in water that would cause it to manfunction suddenly. i have the newest version of itunes etc. i can't do the 5 r's or whatever because i can't reset the **** thing let alone update it. any ideas or am i totally s.o.l.?

This is an interesting iPod detection problem check-list http://www.copytrans.net/helpcopytrans.php#22

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