Complaint - 5 months on and BT have no clue what t...

Question

I have come to the end of my tether. I can not deal with the stress BT have given me by their incompetence and lack of customer care. I reported my broadband losing upstream connection way back in July 2012. I am too tired to sit here and wear my keyboard out typing my life history with BT. In a nutshell since July, I have been having broadband faults and Telephone line faults. In 5 months I have only had 3 weeks of uninterrupted service which is totally unacceptable.
I am appalled by the way the helpdesk in India answers the phone....."Hello, what is your problem"
Where has the common courtesy gone by announcing "Hello BT Helpdesk here, how can I help you" or is that too much to ask?
Anyway, reading the complaints on here, it is all too familiar that other customers are getting treated the same way. Calls always getting cut off and though the helpdesk person has my number, they never ring back!! Come on BT what's your game?
The other thing is that I am always fed a load of bull about what's really gone on. Hey BT I used to be a telephone engineer in the 80s so don't feed me with a load of garbage, I am not supposed to understand their so-called rubbish they tried to feed me. I am more qualified than all the helpdesk people put together. I was also Technical Consultant to the CEO of BTOpenworld, with 23 years of IT experience. I am an expert in Broadband systems as well.
BT knows I can not go to their competitors like Virgin, TalkTalk, Sky etc as they all use BT's equipment (no cable here) and I will be no better off. But hey, I am tempted by Satellite Broadband and 4G which will give me better bandwidth than the puny 3mb that I get when it does work.
I could be your Top Level troubleshooter visiting customers premises and sorting their ongoing problems that no one in BT seems to care about, but then you wouldn't pay me enough!
Now I have got that offloaded, I will be contacting BBC Watchdog and Ofcom/ombudsman for the total incompetence on BT's behalf, oh I forgot to mention............I had exactly the same problems in 2011 and that took months of getting nowhere, so I complained to the ombudsman and they found BT guilty of a list of failings and promised it would never happen again. Well guess what? It has and I am going to complain to them again and get some necks on the line!
Bt has had long enough to sort this out and still has the cheek to bill me each month....Pah
Mods, you can get my case details up on your system, but you will need 3 hours to read through them as I have only touched the tip of the iceberg on here.
Good luck BT, you'll need it!!!

Answer 1

UPDATE:
The engineers turned up this afternoon, with much prodding and poking in the exchange they have given me a new E side.
We both agreed we were not convinced this would solve the problem but the engineer told me to try and do a speedtester.bt.com on it, which would log and prove that I am suffering from these slow up/downstreams.
I told them that speedtester.bt.com doesn't work on any of my Macs as it hangs on 100% on the upload test.
Well I dug out a PC laptop and got it set up ready, and guess what?......yup, speedtest.bt.com hangs at 100% on the upload test then returns with "test error try again later, if this persists contact your service provider"
The beta works fine but they state the results are not recorded.
PLEASE CAN YOU SORT THIS OUT!!!!!!!
How can I give you information from the speedtester when it doesn't work? If you don't get the information then you can't fix the fault.
David M, please can you get this speedtester fault sorted? It's like a garage not being able to fix your car because the hydraulic lift doesn't work!!!!