Computer Crashed New Install of Itunes wants to wipe out iPad

I got an iPad for Christmas. I had iTunes already on a computer and they all played well together - I didn't store any music in my iTunes - just used it to shop and download apps for my iPad. The computer crashed and I lost iTunes. But I had a number of apps and some books on my iPad (which are all in tact and fine).
When I reinstalled iTunes it says something about this iPad doesn't belong to this iTunes installation and gives me a message that says it's going to wipe out everything on my iPad to join it to the new instance of iTunes. I just unplugged my iPad on the spot.
I've tried a number of things and can't figure out how to basically say "No, I want it the other way around. The iPad is mine and I paid for what's on it - make iTunes match my iPad." So I haven't been able to update the iPad software or anything now for months and decided after several attempts to ask for help.
The new computer is running Windows 7 in case it matters.
Thanks!
Jim

1) authorize iTunes on the new machine for your iTunes store account(s)
2) connect your device and right-click or control-click it in the iTunes Source list, then choose transfer purchases from the shortcut menu that appears.
3) sync the device
iTunes will wipe the iPad but, since you transferred your purchases in the previous step, your content will be in your library and you can re-populate the iPad with it.
for everything else, check out this post by Zevoneer.

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