Email sent from Nexus 4 not showing in Mail client

Going from an iPhone to an Android device has it's own issues, but one that shouldn't be an issue is that of IMAP emails.
In replying to any email from the Nexus 4, it will not be available to view in Apple's Mail client, which I use for all 5 of my email accounts.  It will show in Mail that the email has been replied to with the arrow on the left of the email, but it will not allow me to click on the arrow to see the email I sent.  It gives me an error message, 'Mail was unable to find your reply to the message "email subject title". You may have deleted the message'.  Nope, I didn't delete the message, but now I can't see it.  This is a very crucial missing element for business reply emails.  My compnay uses GMail servers for all it's mail, so it's not a me.com email issue specifically.  Funny enough, that email account set up the easiest.  It doesn't show messages sent from the Nexus 4 either, but I'm sure it's all part of the same problem.
Is anyone else having this same/similar issue?
Thanks for the help, Bruce.

For Exchange GMail there is a way to set your iOS device to use a different "Send As" name than when using a computer.  Unfortunately in your case, you can set your computer to send an alternate name but the iOS device can only send the default GMail name, which is the name associated with your account.  Ideally, you would like your iOS device to use the alternate and let your computer use the default.
But if you want to play around with this ...
1- On the iOS device itself, use Safari to navigate to m.google.com/sync.  You will have to log in at the prompt with your GMail account info.
2- Select the iOS device name (in case you have multiple iOS devices using Google sync).
3- Select "Enable 'Send Mail As' for this device" and Save the changes.
4- Using a computer, log into your GMail account and select Settings/ Accounts and Import, then at the "Send mail as" prompt select "edit info" (off to the right).
5- Change your outgoing name.
The name you specify in #5 will be used by your computer, but the iOS device will continue using the original (default) outgoing name.  You can see why you need the opposite in your case, so unless you can change the default to be your wife's name and then set the alternate to be your name, I think you're out of luck.

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