Facebook Notifications - How to turn them off completely?

No matter what I do I keep getting them in my notifications tab.
I don't want to have to open each and every notification just to get rid of them. Right now it's telling me every fart and queef going on Facebook. I turned it off in Options, everything is unchecked. I also set the News Feed to NEVER update. I also logged into Facebook on a computer and set everything to off. Email notifications are also off.
Any help? I did a search and nothing shows to be successful. Please help!
I had this rekindled love for Blackberry and I am about to lose all faith over this issue.
Here is the opposite issue. I'd like to know how to replicate this.
http://supportforums.blackberry.com/t5/Downloaded-applications-for/No-Facebook-notification/td-p/140...
RIM really needs to get it together. People that want notifications can't get them, people that don't want it at all get them.

You guys? This is a user-to-user community support forum. We are not RIM employees, but volunteers who enjoy assisting other users. RIM personnel rarely comment on queries posted here. You would have noticed this in the EULA and message upon registration.
Do you not want to see the Facebook notification icon on the homescreen notification bar?
Options > Device > Applications > see Facebook in the list? Press the Menu key > Delete.
Done.
1. If any post helps you please click the below the post(s) that helped you.
2. Please resolve your thread by marking the post "Solution?" which solved it for you!
3. Install free BlackBerry Protect today for backups of contacts and data.
4. Guide to Unlocking your BlackBerry & Unlock Codes
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