Help, I'm in tears - How do I restore my iPhone settings after upgrading iOS.

Hi, I really hope you guys can help. I have a 3GS, and in preparation of getting the 5, I decided to upgrade the iOS from version 4.3.1 that it was using, to the latest. For some reason, it treated it like a new iPhone - which it isn't - and it's subsequently wiped all of my photos, apps (which I've managed to get most back) and over 10 years' worth of phone numbers and contacts.
I'm in tears because I've lost everything and have no idea what I've done or how to fix it. Please help! How can I fix it?

Thanks to you both. It gave me the option to either treat it as a new iPhone or to backup from iPad. This was on a Mac Mini which I've started using; I have an old laptop that I used to use, so I could use that to back up. I had assumed that it was all the one and the same. Will try that. Thanks.

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