HELP!  iPod not updating like this Apple product should!

Here's the deal. My iPod's main "home" computer is elsewhere. I quit going there some months back. For the past month or so, I have been updating my iPod on my own computer by dragging files into the iPod icon in iTunes while the whole time it would show "DO NO DISCONNECT".
I've been able to do that for quite awhile now. Last night I added the official SmackDown! vs RAW 2007 album onto my iPod then went to workout at the gym. I did NOT drop my iPod or do anything to it last night after it's last "update".
Then last night I wanted to add/drag a song onto my iPod but it quit showing my iPod's icon on iTunes under DEVICES. I tried restarting my iPod many times an reconnecting it but no improvement. I then clicked the harddrive icon for the iPod under "My Computer" and told me it has not been formatted. I clicked format and it said something I will lose all data and I did NOT pay $200 just to get screwed over with errors like this to lose everything.
I don't understand why my iPod won't play/update on my computer anymore all of the sudden.
Another problem. Now when I connect the charger line (connected from my computer) into my iPod, it's not showing "Do Not Disconnect" anymore.
I'd like to know what I could do without getting screwed over by losing loads of money on multimedia purchased on a product that (HOPEFULLY NOT) did nothing but eat away my money.
Thanks

ummm... okay thanks

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