Help! iTunes wont recognise iPod and ive tried everything..

I seem to have this ongoing drama with iTunes. I thought it was all over last week when I updated iTunes with the latest version. Everything was sweet for a couple of days. Now its back!
Whats happenning is this:
I connect iPod.
Nothing happens, it doenst start up iTunes.
So I manually open iTunes.
iTunes is very slow. Finally opens up.
Then it spends another 5mins "frozen".
Finally the iPod pops up but its asking me to re-name it.
It asks me this every time.
When it syncs it takes a long time.
When I ask it to eject, it takes probably 20min.
Sometimes i have to eject it from My Computer.
This is what I have tried to do:
Restart the computer.
Restart iPod.
Change USB ports.
Restore iPod from iTunes - it never actually completed this as after 2 hrs of watching the progress bar not going past the first stage I gave up!
Re-install iTunes. Couldnt get it to go past the part where it was stopping a service? Dont know what this means but it wouldnt re-install.
So can anyone suggest what I should try now cause I am stuck.
Please if you have a suggestion I would appreciate your help.
Thanks.

Update - I have discovered that iTunes will only recognise my iPod if I open it in the following order 1)Connect iPod, and 2)Open iTunes. If I already have iTunes open and then plug the iPod in it wont work.
Its still asking me to set up the iPod and it takes around 5mins to detect the iPod is connected.
Please can anyone help me?????

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Welcome to Apple Discussions!
Have you seen this?
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Also, try resetting the iPod while it is connected to the computer.
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Help! iTunes wont recognise iPod and ive tried everything..

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