Help, My contacts were all deleted

I realize there is a replace information button in iTunes under advanced. This was not selected and on my last sync, my itunes did not sync but erased all my contacts.
I have two phones. I added a new contact directly on my phone, unknowingly when i synced to computer 1 it replaced all my contacts with the newly added contact. (strange) In the meantime all my contacts were deleted somehow and just the 1 newly created contact remained. That change while I went out synced with the rest of my computers in my home, so now all the contacts were deleted there too. ( Again, I ask why I thought it was a sync not a replace)
So now I'm thinking I'm safe I'll just upload the contacts from phone 2, I made sure all settings were perfect and synced phone 2 to a completely different computer. Bamm, all contacts were deleted and replaced with this solo contact.
What is going on?

That doesn't sound right. It is not supposed to delete, but merge all the contacts. Not sure what is going wrong here since you checked out all the settings.

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