Help with syncing songs on iphone4s

Hello,
I need help syncing music on my iphone. I have music on my iphone right now and my laptop crashed so Microsoft restored the operating system. I had to redownload itunes. Now that I have I am having big problems. I do not care for the music on my iphone and have redownloaded all the music I want and have added it to itunes. But I now do not know how to delete the music from itunes that is on my iphone right now and when I try to move songs over to my iphone it will not let me and give me the red stop symbol.
If anyone can help that would be amazing thank you!!!

Do you mean that when you disconnect they dont show up?

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    Apple Support: Managing content manually on iPhone, iPad, and iPod
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