Home sharing with two Macbooks and two Ipod/Iphones

Ive read the tutorials on Home Sharing and am still unclear as to how to move content between two spousal computers, each authorised on separate Ipods/Iphones
We can see each others' Itunes accounts on our network and play content accordingly. 90% of our content is the same (why we are happily married for 25 years) but the 10% that is different is the issue. We cant drag and drop music from one to the other currently.
The tutorial says we have to login to the same Itunes account to move content, but when we do this, it warns us that this will deactivate the Ipod on the other machine - which we dont want of course. We want to move the few songs from one Itunes account to the other while keeping our Ipods/Iphones authorised on our separate machines.
Am i misunderstanding the Home Sharing functionality or is it designed only for a 'shared Itunes account' essentially? That wouldnt work for us.

Ipod/iphones have nothing to do with Home Sharing.
Your ipods/iphones should not even be connected to the computer when you are using home sharing.
Move the music, then sign into your regular account, then sync.

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