How can I sync my new Mac to my iphone?

I knew my old computer was giving up on me so I was trying to back up my iTunes on my old HP computer on an external drive...but I was too late! It crashed before I could back it up somewhere else. The good thing is that I was able to sync my phone first and synce my whole iTunes library on to my phone..but now I can't figure out how to get my iTunes on my new Mac to sync to my phone vs. syncing my phone to iTunes? I was able to of course download all the stuff I purchased on iTunes but can't seem to get all the other music I uploaded from CD's to my new iTunes on my new Mac. I haven't been able to update my phone in sooooo long time because I'm afraid to "sync" my new iTunes and loose all the songs on my iPhone that weren't purchased through iTunes. Does that make sense? Someone please, please help!!

Syncing to a new iTunes library or computer will erase your phone. Only if you back up manually before syncing, you can restore your device from that backup again. A manual backup does not include the sync process.
Disable autosync in iTunes, connect your phone to your new computer and right click on it in the device list and choose backup. iTunes will backup your device without syncing.
Transfer your purchases the same way, choosing "transfer purchases" this time.
When you connect your phone for the first time, all media content will be erased. But you can restore your settings and app data from your manual backup afterwards.
Don't forget to set up at least one contact and event on your new computer to be able to merge calendars and contacts when you sync the iPhone for the first time.
Music is one way only, from the computer to your device, unless you bought the songs in itunes and transferred your purchases.
For all other media you'll have to use 3rd party software, some mentioned in this thread:
http://discussions.apple.com/thread.jspa?threadID=2013615&tstart=0
About backups and what's saved:iTunes: About iOS backups
How to back up and restore:http://support.apple.com/kb/HT1414
How to download apps for free again:http://support.apple.com/kb/HT2519
Saving other data is also described here. How to back up your data and set up as a new device

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