How can my wife's iPad share my iTunes library?

My wife hqs a new ipad and would like to copy some songs from our itunes library in my macbook pro.  My computer does not show her ipad on my finder but my itunes wants to synch her.  I don't want to give her the whole library. How does she get access to the library?

Hi, Carlwein.
I would recommend setting up manually manage music and videos.  This will allow you to drag and drop media onto the device via iTunes. 
Managing content manually on iPhone, iPad, and iPod
http://support.apple.com/kb/HT1535
If the media you wish to share is purchased from iTunes, you also have the option to download the content again via her device and your Apple ID. 
Downloading past purchases from the App Store, iBookstore, and iTunes Store
http://support.apple.com/kb/HT2519
The last option I could recommend if she has a separate computer that she syncs with would be Home Sharing.  This will allow her transfer media from your computer. 
iTunes: Setting up Home Sharing on your computer
http://support.apple.com/kb/HT4620
Cheers,
Jason H. 

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