How come playlists and total songs don't match up when syncing in iTunes?

Hello,
I own an iPod Touch 5G and sync it regularly via usb cable to my MacBook Pro 17", using iTunes 11. I seem to have a terrible time understanding the concept of syncing music/movies via the "selected playlists, artists, albums, and genres" option. That doesn't mean that I'm choosing to sync manually, just means that I'm syncing only certain playlists/content, even if done "automatically" whenever I connect device with iTunes, correct?
For some time now, well before iTunes 11 came out, I haven't been able to accurately sync the music and videos I'd like to "push" to the iPod Touch. No matter how many times I sync or think I'm removing content from the iPod touch by way of iTunes, I always end up with more on the iPod than I ever wanted. It seems like that capacity bar at the bottom of iTunes screen telling me what's on the Touch is a big joke, as it never seems to accurately show what's on there.
For example, I have a lot more songs and videos in iTunes than what my Touch has space for, so I can never have all my content syncing to the Touch. I have created numerous playlists inside iTunes, in fact, this is how I organize my music for listening.  I was under the assumption that whatever playlists I check while inside of iPod touch area of iTunes when the devices is connected, those are the ONLY playlists and songs that will be on the iPod touch. This is never the case. After checking the desired playlists and syncing, I have the correct number of desired playlists on the iPod (let's say it's currently 10 playlists), but in actuality, when I go to the iPod touch after disconnecting from iTunes, there's a LOT more songs on iPod than just the ones within those 10 playlists. It's like when I got rid of some of the playlists on the iPod touch, the songs never got erased, only the playlists they were place in.
So, my question is, in short, how do I have ONLY the songs within my 10 playlists and no more after syncing with iTunes? Similar issue pertains to my synced videos/home movies. They are never erased from Touch, even though certain ones are unchecked within iTunes.  If somebody could shed light on this issue, I'd greatly appreciate it! I feel like something designed to be so easy and logical has been anything but that.

when you play the CD in your laptop on your home screen a Cd should pop up under the name of the album. Than when you open itunes it will probly say something like "let this CD download" or something like that. If it doesn't than automaticlly while the CD is importing to your itunes a page will pop up with a progess of the CD download.
Hope that helped.

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