How do I get my iPhone 4 to transfer purchases to a new computer?

I got a new computer (Windows) and I want to switch my iPhoneover so I don't have to use my old computer to sync anymore.  I did the "backing up the original library and restoring it onto the new computer" thing, but that apparently didn't copy over all the songs that were in my library because I should have just over 1600, give or take a few that I bought on my phone and never transferred over to the computer, but it only lists 871 songs, and it refuses to transfer purchases from my iPhone saying "you need to authorize this computer." I authorized and deauthorized and reauthorized, but it still says it needs to be authorized. When i click authorize, at this point, it lets me go through authorization...only to tell me "this computer is already authorized."
I'm incredibly frustrated and am at my wits end. I cross-checked the songs that are on my computer to the ones that are on my actual phone and a lot of my absolute favorites aren't on my computer so I don't want to just sync it and lose them all, but I'd like to be able to sync my phone to my computer so that I can update and put some new audiobooks on it because I listen to a lot of audiobooks at my job.
Any help would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.

Make sure iTunes on the computer is logged into the account on the phone.
Plug the iPhone in.
In the popup window warning about wiping your phone, hit cancel.
In the left pane of iTunes, the phone icon should be there.
Right click on it, select transfer purchases.
Note: this will only transfer music bought from iTunes. Not mp3's from amazon or ripped from CD's.

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