How do I get this stupid thing to work anyway? Im trying to set it up and it's not working (FWIW I'm typing this on my real computer - not an apple)

Can't set it up. The damned thing is yammering at me, unhelpfully. Tempted to use a hammer on it by now.

A new Mac comes with 90 days of free tech support from AppleCare.
AppleCare: 1-800-275-2273
Call AppleCare. They will walk you through the steps over the line.
Best.

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