How do i share media (music and videos) between all of my devices?

i currently have (and attempt to use as much as possible) the following devices:  macbook pro 15", ipad 4, iphone 6 plus 64 GB, and appletv 2.
i would love it if these devices would talk to each other correctly.  first came the macbook, and i took an internal 2 tb drive cannibalized from my previous pc and transformed it into an external.  that drive is desinated as my media drive, it includes all of my video and music.  the macbook and the appletv talk to each other flawlessly.  every music and video file on that drive is accesible to me using apple tv. 
next up is the ipad, which includes some of my videos (movies), but no tv shows.  music also does not show up, only options to buy from the store.  but i already have a music library that includes many songs downloaded from the store that dont show up, only some stupid U2 album that i never downloaded.
finally, we get to the iphone, which i just got.  i get no shared music or videos here at all.
by the way, all settings are set to share with each device in settings and itunes.  each device talks to one another.  i know this because there is some level of sharing on each device (ie ipad gets videos, iphone shares spreadsheets and other productivity files.  appletv shares everything.  i now want to sync these devices so that they can share the same data while on the same home network.  i should be able to do this, right?
also, i know that i can airdrop/transfer but thats not really what im looking to do atm.
thanks
spencer c

im more than a little disappointed here.  can anyone recommend another forum please?

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