How do I stop iTunes from coming up when I plug in the iPhone

I don't always want iTunes to come up, only for syncing, when I plug in my iPhone or iPad. I most often just download photos using Image Capture and don't need iTunes for that.
I see nothing in iTunes preferences (where it should be you would think) about disabling iTunes from starting up when  you plug in the iPhone.

I'm being careful to rely on help with this as I have in the past 'done what is logical' and wound up destroying files and in a pickle. So I ask this one other related questions then:
If I want to back up to computer then the 'automatically backs up to this computer' really means nothing as the message across from it says it has never been backed up before even though it automatically syncs then?
This is very thin ice. I think I do remember in older versions of iTunes a checkbox like the one you mentioned first, but now it is gone.
Whew. I'm sweating out what to do next.

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