How do i use my phone number instead of my apple id for imessage on my iphone5?

I accidentally selected my apple id for sending and receiving imessages. I want to be reached at my phone number and not my email first, but I can't figure out how to make my phone number the primary and my email the secondary.
Also, my son and I are in a text message mode between our phones (both apple products) and we can't figure out how to get back to imessage mode. We have both powered off and shut down imessage and we are still going green to each other.

iOS and OS X: Link your phone number and Apple ID for use with FaceTime and iMessage - Apple Support

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