How do iShare ONLY purchases, calendar & contacts w/ family

We still share 1apple ID & 1 iCloud from way back when.  Kids were little, syncing was simple... turned off their device iCloud and synced apps, playlist, shows w/ iMac via usb.  I loved having my contacts, bookmarks, notes synced via iCloud and it became VERY handy when kid1 got an iPhone (appointments, practices, friends #s w/ ease!)   We've recently added a macbook and another iPhone to the mix, we've got music issues & iPads ringing.... so a potential overall may be due?
Now that Family Sharing is here, it's still missing features that we USE:
* Notes (grocery list, packing lists...)
* Contacts (each family member has a 'group' name, they add to their group and the family's master list is 'all contacts' for anyone to access incase of emergencies.... anyone keeping up w/ kids lately?!)
* And the ever present iCloud icon is a looming feature for anyone, any age in the shared-family to be too curious...
* CAN any of these features be added along w/ Family Sharing?
HOW do I set up a simple family sharing system w/o interfering w/ bookmarks, personal notes, FaceTime/msg crossovers :
share our purchases (apps, music from our iTunes/playlists, podcast),
share our calendar
share our contacts
share a family notes
msgs/facetime for each member
mom: iphone, ipad, imac
dad:  iphone
kid1: iphone, macbook
kid2: ipad
kid3: ipad
research produced:  add this account, that account, 2 accounts (what kind of accounts? apple ID, iCloud emails?), this email, that email, this on, that off, add account to this person, but turn off this and that, use home sharing...  it started out simple and now i'm just overwhelmed- think I need a step by step FLOW chart !!!) 
Thanks to anyone that has this set up and will share the method to my madness

After u connect the iphone, in the 'info' tab, there is an advanced section at the bottom. Based on what u selected above (i.e. mail, cal, browser etc), u can select one of the boxes. If it's calender, the calender info on the iphone will be replace with the one on the computer. The downside is, even this one u have to check the box every time. Hope that helps...

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