How do you add a new buddy and have it save them?

when i add a new buddy the person shows up under offline but i know that the person is online because she is texting me and then 2 minutes later the person dissapers and ichat doesn't work with the person. the person who i am trying to add to my list is doing the same thing but it's still not working, why?

Hi
It would help to know what type of Buddy they are (AIM, Jabber or Yahoo) ?
It would also help to know which version of iChat you are using (Some (most) versions don't do Yahoo)?
Then we need to know what Screen Name or ID you have ?
This will tell us what sort of Buddy List you are trying to Add the person to.
AIM Buddies (Included @mac.com and @me.com names) can be set to Invisible in some version of iChat in in some other apps if they are not using iChat.
Also look in iChat menu > Preferences > Accounts > Security tab  for your AIM accounts
There are variation as to who is allowed and who isn't allow to See you as On line.
This can be complicated by the settings at the Buddies end.
Jabber Buddy lists
When you add a Buddy here it sends an "Authorisation Request" fro them to be a Buddy.
They have to either Agree  or Decline.
iChat sends this Request just once and if th Buddy does ot answer it they appear in the Off Line Section of your Buddy list (although they can text you and appear in Dark Text suggesting they are On line)
Jabber (Includes Google Talk and Facebook) cannot be set to Invisible.
It is best that you add the Buddy at an agreed time or use a third party app such as Psi that keeps sending Authorisation Requests until the person Accepts or Declines.
7:40 PM      Thursday; August 9, 2012
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