How to back up/sync two phones on one PC?

Aloha, This is my first post on this forum, so if I'm on the wrong board or if this has been discussed, I apologize.
About two months ago, I purchased two iPhone 3GS's (for my wife's and my use). I have been able to sync the phones individually on two different pc's, but am unable to figure out how to sync both on my desk machine (for back up/speed purposes). I can find lots of articles and instructions on how to sync one phone on multiple machines, but am unable to find info on how to do two phones on one computer.
Basically, I am unable to get the iTunes software to back up/sync the music collection on her phone--it says that all will be deleted in favor of the library (that is associated with my phone). I have tried logging in the iTunes software with her iTunes acct info, but I still get the same response.
Any information that you can provide will be greatly appreciated. For the record, our phones are both current (iPhone OS v. 3.1 [not 3.0.1]) and iTunes is v. 9.0.0.70--which according to the upgrade blurb said it has better multiple phone capabilities. (It looks and acts the same to me--so obviously, I'm not doing something right!) TIA.

You cannot take itunes content from the iphone and put it on the computer. The iphone sync is one way. It is designed to sync with a computer, not as a stand alone device.]
The exception to this rule is itunes purchased content as described in an earlier post.
" If I want to mirror her iPhone on MY pc however, you're saying it can't be done?"
Yes, that is what I'm saying. The iphone is designed to reflect the content of the computer/library that it syncs with, not the other way around.
You need to copy everything to the new computer, then sync. When you sync to a different computer, it will erase itunes content from the iphone first, then sync to the new itunes library/computer.
"What's the purpose of authorizing multiple computers to connect the phone to if you can't do that?"
You don't "authorize" computers for iphone. You authorize computers to play protected itunes content on the computer.
Again, iphone will sync itunes content and pics with ONE computer at a time. This is the way it has been and continues to be.
Ipods are different, but the iphone will sync with ONE computer at a time.
As far as itunes content and pics go - the iphone mirrors the computer, not the other way around.

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