HT5621 I just want to delete my primary email address as it no longer exists but it says I'm already using my new address so how come I can't find it. I just want my new main address to be the only one registered to this account

This is going around in circles I want to delete my existing (closed) address and replace it with my now only functioning address but it won't let me saying it is in use. Well not by me on this account its not

http://support.apple.com/kb/HT5621
In short, you have a problem we can't solve.
I suggest you contact Apple support and make an appointment to get help.  Expect to pay for it.

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