I am currently watching my tv screen saying "step 1 of 2 preparing update.  The progress bar is stuck at the P in preparing. Has been 20 min. now.

What do I do now!?

Its not the software.  The update only takes about 10 min tops.  There is some kind of connection issue between your ATV and the update servers. 
Although yes you are right about Apples software going sharply down hill in the last three years.

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