I am having problems with my itunes, when plugging my iphone or ipod to the laptop - i can see iphone/ipod in the top right corner of itunes but when i click this to the see what is on theis iphone/ipod the option is no longer there, this was working

I am having problems with the new itunes set up ........
when i plug in my iphone or ipod touch it shows in the top right hand corner of itunes
BUT when i click on the shown iphone/ipod the icon its no longer there, i was useing this fine yesterday and it was showing yesterday what is on this ipod and would allow me to add/remove music, but now this option is no longer availlable - i have added a couple of albums to my itunes i can listen to the music from the laptop but cannot sync the ipods to trancefer these albums to the handheld devices -
i have been trying to sort this all day with no luck not sure if there is a problems with itunes or is it something i am doing ????
HELP !!!!!!!!!!!!

BOB we need you urgently
Perhaps Bob will see this thread, he is the professor in these cases.
You do not use a WEP password but wpa/wpa2 on router and equipment.
All equipment connects to WiFi, but for your iPad.
Even with all other equipment WiFi off, you cannot connect your iPad.
Your iPad connects to other WiFi nets correctly.
All resets etc done on iPad and Router.
Still I am not sure it is your router for sure, frustrating...
I want to test 2 other things:
1. in your iPad, set everything OFF in Settings/Cellular, turn off/then/on your WiFi, and see whether it will still not connect...
2. If that does not do it: disconnect the router as well as the modem from the power, for 15 seconds, then reconnect the modem, let it fully start, then reconnect the routet let it fully start, turn of your WiFi in iPad, then on, and see whether it will connect.

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