I can't update an iPhone 4 from IOS 4.2.1 to IOS 6 via iTunes?

Ive been trying to update my iPhone 4 from version IOS 4.2.1. to version IOS 6.
I've updated my iTunes to version 11.0.2. and afterwards when told '
You're currently on version 4.2.1.... update to IOS version 6' and me agreeing and selecting...
I get a message saying 'backing up'... and it completes... but then when I switch my phone off and
back on again I'm still on version 4.2.1.!!!!! I've tried three 3 to no avail.
Is there something I should know. I'm completely stuck. Please help! :-)

Hi there, Thank you.
I can only get as far as iTunes> File> Devices and then 'Transfer Purchases' is greyed out.
(nothing happens if I 'right click' on it either). Backup also greyed out...
And I'm sorry I don't know how to access the summary page of my phone!

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