I can't use Macbook Pro's keyboard when the Internet is connected

This is the strangest issue I have ever encountered and it just started happening this morning.
When I have my internet connection (WiFi) turned on it refuses to recognize my keyboard. The trackpad on my laptop screws up too. I left-click and it acts as if I've right-clicked (context menu becomes visable). I've restarted numerous times. I have all the current updates for my OS (running Lion), have run the Disk Utitlity and all that.
I went to the Genius Bar this morning but my next appointment isn't til 7pm! In hopes that it'd start working properly, I opened my laptop in a Starbucks and didn't connect to any networks. Poof! No issues! Then when I tried to connect using WiFi it began acting nuts again. I tried connecting with my mobile hotspot on iPhone and it doesn't react strangely to that. Only when it's the regular WiFi.
If anyone has any suggestions on resolving this issue I would be most grateful. I have a lot of work to do today (off-site graphic design contractor) and I cannot do it without a laptop connected to the internet (I have to download about 6GBs of files and my ATT bill is gonna look insane).

Yes LS needs a update to work with the changes in 10.6.8, so does Parallels.
Read my backup, bootable clones, troubleshooting, performance, wifi security and restore info/advice here
https://discussions.apple.com/message/16276201#16276201

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    com.apple.driver.AppleMuxControl          3.4.12
    com.apple.driver.ACPI_SMC_PlatformPlugin          1.0.0
    com.apple.driver.AppleLPC          1.7.0
    com.apple.driver.AppleMCCSControl          1.1.12
    com.apple.nvidia.NVDAStartup          8.1.8
    com.apple.driver.SMCMotionSensor          3.0.4d1
    com.apple.filesystems.autofs          3.0
    com.apple.driver.AppleUSBTCButtons          240.2
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    com.apple.driver.AppleUSBCardReader          3.3.5
    com.apple.iokit.SCSITaskUserClient          3.6.0
    com.apple.driver.XsanFilter          404
    com.apple.iokit.IOAHCIBlockStorage          2.4.0
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    com.apple.driver.AppleAHCIPort          2.9.5
    com.apple.driver.AppleRTC          2.0
    com.apple.driver.AppleFWOHCI          4.9.9
    com.apple.driver.AirPort.Brcm4331          700.20.22
    com.apple.driver.AppleUSBEHCI          650.4.1
    com.apple.driver.AppleUSBOHCI          650.4.1
    com.apple.driver.AppleSmartBatteryManager          161.0.0
    com.apple.nvenet          2.0.21
    com.apple.driver.AppleHPET          1.8
    com.apple.driver.AppleACPIButtons          2.0
    com.apple.driver.AppleSMBIOS          2.0
    com.apple.driver.AppleACPIEC          2.0
    com.apple.driver.AppleAPIC          1.7
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    com.apple.nvidia.classic.NVDAResmanTesla          8.1.8
    com.apple.driver.DspFuncLib          2.5.3fc1
    com.apple.vecLib.kext          1.0.0
    com.apple.iokit.IOAudioFamily          1.9.4fc11
    com.apple.kext.OSvKernDSPLib          1.14
    com.apple.iokit.CHUDKernLib          365
    com.apple.iokit.IOBluetoothHostControllerUSBTransport          4.2.0f6
    com.apple.iokit.IOFireWireIP          2.2.5
    com.apple.driver.AppleHDAController          2.5.3fc1
    com.apple.iokit.IOHDAFamily          2.5.3fc1
    com.apple.driver.AppleBacklightExpert          1.0.4
    com.apple.iokit.IONDRVSupport          2.3.6
    com.apple.driver.AppleGraphicsControl          3.4.12
    com.apple.driver.IOPlatformPluginLegacy          1.0.0
    com.apple.driver.AppleSMBusPCI          1.0.12d1
    com.apple.driver.IOPlatformPluginFamily          5.5.1d27
    com.apple.driver.AppleSMBusController          1.0.11d1
    com.apple.iokit.IOGraphicsFamily          2.3.6
    com.apple.driver.AppleSMC          3.1.6d1
    com.apple.kext.triggers          1.0
    com.apple.driver.AppleUSBMultitouch          240.6
    com.apple.iokit.IOUSBHIDDriver          650.4.4
    com.apple.iokit.IOUSBMassStorageClass          3.6.0
    com.apple.iokit.IOSCSIBlockCommandsDevice          3.6.0
    com.apple.iokit.IOSCSIMultimediaCommandsDevice          3.6.0
    com.apple.iokit.IOBDStorageFamily          1.7
    com.apple.iokit.IODVDStorageFamily          1.7.1
    com.apple.iokit.IOCDStorageFamily          1.7.1
    com.apple.driver.AppleUSBMergeNub          650.4.0
    com.apple.driver.AppleUSBComposite          650.4.0
    com.apple.iokit.IOAHCISerialATAPI          2.6.0
    com.apple.iokit.IOSCSIArchitectureModelFamily          3.6.0
    com.apple.iokit.IOUSBUserClient          650.4.4
    com.apple.driver.AppleEFINVRAM          2.0
    com.apple.iokit.IOAHCIFamily          2.6.0
    com.apple.iokit.IOFireWireFamily          4.5.5
    com.apple.iokit.IO80211Family          600.34
    com.apple.iokit.IOUSBFamily          650.4.4
    com.apple.driver.AppleEFIRuntime          2.0
    com.apple.iokit.IONetworkingFamily          3.2
    com.apple.driver.NVSMU          2.2.9
    com.apple.iokit.IOHIDFamily          2.0.0
    com.apple.iokit.IOSMBusFamily          1.1
    com.apple.security.TMSafetyNet          7
    com.apple.security.sandbox          278.10
    com.apple.kext.AppleMatch          1.0.0d1
    com.apple.iokit.IOReportFamily          21
    com.apple.driver.DiskImages          371.1
    com.apple.iokit.IOStorageFamily          1.9
    com.apple.driver.AppleKeyStore          2
    com.apple.driver.AppleFDEKeyStore          28.30
    com.apple.driver.AppleACPIPlatform          2.0
    com.apple.iokit.IOPCIFamily          2.8
    com.apple.iokit.IOACPIFamily          1.4
    com.apple.kec.pthread          1
    com.apple.kec.corecrypto          1.0

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