Ical sharing issue

I have an icloud account that i share calenders with my work collegues just fine, i wanted to share just my home calender with my wife, but there is where the issue starts. My home calender on my Imac is shared via a me.com icloud account. When i type my wifes me.com email address to share it does nothing, in so far as it sends her no invitation direct to her icloud calender or her email address via the share link. If however i send it to her itunes based address i.e a yahoo.co.uk address it goes through as a link on the email and via a browser she can see the shared calender, also after doing this its visable on her iphone 4S, however no matter how i change her settings its just does not come on to her mac. Both the iphone and macpro icloud is logged in under the me.com account not the itunes account so why would this be?
Its really making me scratch my head.
Just for info...both my ical and hers are running mountain lion and both iphones are updated to the latest iOS.

Welcome to the Apple Community.
Have you checked her mail rules and filtering, the email may be going to a junk folder or even being deleted.

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