Ichat buddies are grey when they are online

I have set up my daughter with a minimac. they have a netgear WPN824 wireless router connected to a comcast modem. We have set up and tested Skype video chats and they work fine. But iChat (version 5) shows all buddies offline and grey even when we know one is online (and that person reports that we show 'offline' and grey on her buddy list). Our status is online and available. We are running SL 10.6.1. Normal internet connectivity is fine.
Could this be a port setting issue for iChat?

AS indicated in my first post in this thread you and she have to check the Security setting in iChat first.
They are found in iChat menu > Preferences > Accounts and it is a tab on the right.
There are several Allow and Block settings.
If the name you have for her is not blocked and the names she has for the rest of you are not Blocked then you have to check if the Names are "right".
In iChat 4 (Leopard) you can have one of several type of names that can Log in to the AIM servers. These can be an AIM one or one of the Apple ones.
You have to choose how you enter the names to make it work.
Your Buddies also have to be entered as the Correct "type" as you add them. You have to select either AIM, @Mac.com or MobileMe for @me.com names. Getting this bit "wrong" will make the Buddy appear as if they are Off Line (Greyed out).
In Snow Leopard/iChat 5 they have made in simpler in adding Buddies by just entering the whole Buddy name even if it as an @mac or @me.com suffix.
So check the name is spelt correctly.
If Leopard that the Screen Name is entered as the Correct type.
(it can be complicated if she has Allow Buddy List Only and she has your names "wrong")
Most likely though she has Internet Sharing ON or has the Firewall set to Allow Essentials Only in Leopard which will block iChat (Use Allow All or Allow Specifics)
8:21 PM Thursday; October 15, 2009
Please, if posting Logs, do not post any Log info after the line "Binary Images for iChat"

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