ICloud and selective downloads (iCloud for a Family 2!)

I haven't yet updated to iOS 5 because I don't know how to manage our account for a Family, and any help would be greatly appreciated.
Presently, we have a single iTunes account linked to my desktop Apple. On it are my wife and I and 2 children. We all download what we want (kid's ipads are age restricted and they have to ask before buying anything! Our account is linked only to iTunes cards, not a credit card!) and I manually synch all devices with the desktop about once a week or so.
This is working fine, as you can choose what content goes onto each device when you sync.... we don't all want the same apps, books, music etc., obviously.
But... is that how it works for iCloud? I am worried that if something is downloaded on one device, it automatically appears on the others. That wouldn't work for us....I don't want what the kids download, and I don't want some of what I download on the kids devices.
I realise that one way around it is to have 4 separate accounts... but then I'd end up paying 4 times for anything that we do want to share ( a song, an app, etc.)
Have I misunderstood iCloud? Can i configure it as I do now? Or can I upgrade to iOS 5 and simply choose not to use iCloud? I'd try it out but won't be able to revert to iOS 4 if it goes wrong!
Any help appreciated.....
PS... I did post a similar topic a while ago, and got some help, but I've hopefully now clarified my issue.

I cloud is for Mail, contacts, calendars, ect.  It reall has nothing to do with I tunes.  In the settings, you can turn off syncing apps, music, and books, for each device.  That will keep all apps, music, and books to syncing to each device.  You will have to manually check what apps your want synced or not in iTunes. 

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