Infuriating IMAP problem in Mail - Help!

I have just starting hooking up Mail with our company's IMAP server. I need to do this since I use a desktop and a laptop, both of which need to have exactly the same e-mail on them, including flagged items, sent etc. It seems to work OK except for one thing - Whenever I send a mail, next time I check mail and it syncs with the server, the mail I just sent shows up in bold (unread) in the sent messages folder. I can see why it is doing this - It's because I store my sent messages on the server, along with my incoming mail, so when the sent message is synchronized it thinks it is "new" or unread. I need to sent messages stored on the server as if I don't then it negates the whole point of me using IMAP. Does anyone know a workaround or a way to stop this? If not it's back to POP3 for me and the joy of copying my entire mail folder to my laptop when I go away and back again when I return.......
Thanks

Thanks for the help. Here's what that folder contains:
Deleted.imapmbox
Drafts.imapmbox
INBOX.imapmbox
Sent Messages.imapmbox
I've messed with every possible setting on the IMAP account in Mail and also in the options section of our IMAP web interface but to no avail. I've also experimented with the "Use this folder for..." setting as-well, but it's just not doing anything.
The whole point of this was to ensure that when I go away (which I often do) I can just sync the MacBook Pro up with the IMAP server and avoid having to run my sync scripts I made to copy my mail folder etc. over from the desktop. Ironically, it only takes a double click to do that and I spent all of Sunday morning trying to get this stuff sorted then ended up going back to POP3....So much for technology.
There are quite a lot of Apple Mail/IMAP issues similar to this (although not all identical) around the web on forums (here too) and I have seen at least 1 person who had the same issue. I think Entourage handles it better but I'm not willing to use that due to the fact that it doesn't use Apple's address book.
The detail from the console output which someone else posted that had a similar problem seems to indicate some kind of incompatibility with the flags and status info that Mail and the IMAP server exchange. It also appears that different server software companies have different interpretations of the IMAP standard, which causes much finger pointing and gets nothing done. I should say that the issue is identical on the MBP as well as the G5 Desktop.
It looks like I will have to wait until 10.4.7 is released to see if it is fixed. Apple are supposed to be focussing heavily on some unresolved Mail problems in that release so maybe it will fix it, but I'm not holding my breath.

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